Tag Archives: Dave Barry

Amusing Monday: Sunday is ‘Talk Like a Pirate Day’

Shiver me timbers and avast you landlubbers!

“Talk Like a Pirate Day” is almost here. It will be this Sunday, Sept. 19. All folks, good and bad, are called on to, well, talk like a pirate for a day.

Strangely enough, this international event started out with a couple of guys — John “Ol’ Chumbucket” Baur and Mark “Cap’n Slappy” Summers joking around while playing racquetball. They started poking fun and encouraging each other in pirate lingo. The two celebrated the annual occasion of talking like pirates somewhat quietly among friends for seven years until 2002, when they sent the idea to syndicated columnist Dave Barry, who made it an international event.

So now these two guys have a website, TalkLikeaPirate.com, which has grown through the years and includes tips and all manner of fun and games.

There’s also the official “International Talk Like a Pirate Fan Page” on Facebook, and I’m sure this crazy idea has started producing some major booty for them and a good number of other folks who have jumped aboard the Jolly Roger. I’ll leave you to investigate these treasures on your own.

In the spirit of Amusing Monday, I’d like to share with you this video about Robot Pirates, which I found amusing, though it probably has nothing to do with Talk Like a Pirate Day.

But the event was clearly being celebrated by Freaking News and a bunch of folks who created Photoshop images on the theme “If pirates ruled the world.” Most include some well-known people dressed as pirates in various situations, which I think you’ll find amusing. Since the contest has been going on several years, there are a lot of photos, organized here in galleries:

Gallery 1, 2007
Gallery 2, 2008
Gallery 3, 2009

Amusing Monday: Words and more words

Today, I offer a potpourri of old sayings, quotes, jokes and proverbs on the subject of water.

“Sponges grow in the ocean. That just kills me. I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be if that didn’t happen.” — Stephen Wright

“There’s something wrong with a mother who washes out a measuring cup with soap and water after she’s only measured water in it.” — Erma Bombeck

“In an age when man has forgotten his origins and is blind even to his most essential needs for survival, water along with other resources has become the victim of his indifference.” — Rachel Carson

“It is wise to bring some water, when one goes out to look for water.” — Arab Proverb

“Mo Udall loved telling a story about one of Arizona’s first U.S. senators, Henry Fountain Ashurst (D-Ariz.). As told by Udall, Ashurst in his maiden speech on the Senate floor not long after Arizona gained statehood in 1912 gushed, “Mr President, this great new baby state of Arizona has the potential to become a veritable paradise … (and) to become a veritable paradise we need only two things. We need water and we need lots of good people.” At that point an aging senator from Vermont asked Ashurst to yield. “It the gentleman will forgive me, that’s all they need in hell.”
From the book ” John J. Rhodes, Man of the House” by J. Brian Smith

“Society, my dear, is like salt water, good to swim in but hard to swallow.” — Arthur Stringer, “The Silver Poppy”

“If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do all the rest have to drown too?” — Steven Wright

I’m singing in the rain, just singing in the rain;
What a wonderful feeling, I’m happy again.
— Arthur Freed

“Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer.” — Dave Barry

Water under the bridge — English idiom

A drop in the bucket — Isaiah 40:15 (King James Version)

“In every glass of water we drink, some of the water has already passed through fishes, trees, bacteria, worms in the soil, and many other organisms, including people… Living systems cleanse water and make it fit, among other things, for human consumption.” — Elliot A. Norse, “Animal Extinctions”

How beautiful is the rain!
After the dust and the heat,
In the broad and fiery street,
In the narrow lane,
How beautiful is the rain!
— Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, Rain in Summer

“All the water that will ever be is right now.” — National Geographic

“When the well is dry, we know the worth of water.” — Benjamin Franklin