Bremerton: Mullets Welcome

Haters Never Prosper

The Seattle Times ran a story today about a hairstylist in Port Orchard – a hotbed of trendsetting –  offering to remove from people a haircut particularly offensive to player haters.

For those who don’t care what hipsters think, the mullet’s essentials include long in back, short in front and for those who still think saying the word “mullet” is funny, you probably are still trying to convince yourself Family Guy is clever, PBR will get you drunk and the Shins are good music.

(I was going to make a disparaging comparison to Death Cab for Cutie, but figured I might get in trouble with the Bremerton Chamber of Commerce.)

So get off your high horse, Port Orchard. There was a time when this would be funny, back when kosmo.com was delivering VHS tapes to heroin addicts with pierced eyebrows in Belltown collectives.

Now it’s as tired as a man in tight pants and an ironic T-shirt. The fact is, mullets are coming back and making fun of them is more anachronistic than the hairstyle itself.

That’s right, mark my words, you can’t backlash against something this fiercely without it returning as an ironic trend. Remember how despised bellbottoms were in the late ’80s?

And for those who want to wear their hair in ways that offends fashion prigs, come to Bremerton.

We don’t hate, we congratulate.

4 thoughts on “Bremerton: Mullets Welcome

  1. Binion here:

    Lady mullets, nay, all mullets, are welcome, as far as I am concerned. And when the hipsters start sporting them again en masse, Bremerton will reap the rewards. It will be like Nirvana all over again, except instead of a band, it will be a hairstyle. And instead of Seattle, it will be Bremerton … you get the picture.

  2. Like the pasty-barista fad, Bremerton had better hurry up before Belfair starts eating your lunch again. Hey, how about pasty-clad baristas with mullets? That should set Bremerton apart.

    Personally, I think all the mullet-heads should gather in Bremerton. We in SK will gladly send you ours. That could even achieve the Growth Management Act goals. But don’t tell KAPO, they just can’t get behind that party in the back thing…

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