Kitsap Sun copy editor, island native and true-crime novelist Jim Thomsen has stumbled upon the one true test of a real-deal islander.
While leafing through the online pages of Facebook, Jim found a 2007 Bainbridge High School grad has posted the definitive “You Know You’re From Bainbridge When ….” list. I should warn you, the list is long, and contains references to at least one illegal use of an apple, but hey, that’s life on “the Rock.”
Here goes….
“So, you know you’re from Bainbridge when…
1.You base your entire day around the ferry times, and live by it.2.You get bent out of shape when the ferry prices go up 50 cents.
3.You have days created like Wasted Wednesday, or Forty Friday.
4.You actually enjoy the rain, but never take one sunny day for granted.
5.The mountains are what you use to navigate north south east and west.
6.You leave town and MISS the mountains.
7.You know the police officers by name.
8.You see a cop and automatically hate him.
9.Sweatpants, houseslippers and Nalgene bottles are a way of life.
10.You see a sign on the side of the road for glass blowing, and you know it’s artwork, but you still grin hoping it means what you think it means.
11.You see someone you know, everywhere and anywhere you go.
12.You’ve smoked weed with one of your teachers.
13.You appreciate that your football team is bad because they are worried about lacrosse season.
14.You could walk ANYWHERE.
15.You look down on Poulsbo even though it’s hardly 10 minutes away.
16.You call it “The Rock.”
17.You’ve been swimming in the goddamn Puget Sound.
18.You boycott a school function because there are breathalizers.
19.You cause school functions to have breathalizers.
20.You separate and discriminate because of what end of the island someone
lives on.21.You either know someone close or actually do drive a Volvo.
22.You’ve EVER found yourself at Safeway on a weekend night.
23.You can’t rent movies at Silver Screen because of late fees out the ying
yang24.Safeway getting remodeled annoyed you.
25.You know and love Jack Johnson, Dave Matthews and Sublime.
26.You think Bremerton is ghetto.
27. You find simple everyday pleasure in Sawatdy’s and Teriyaki Town and have them stored in your cell phone or memorized.
28. The lady from “It’s Casual” brightens your day
29.Paying to see a movie at the movie theater pisses you off.
30.You’ve smoked weed out of an apple
31. You move away and don’t understand why no one can keep up with your drinking tolerance.
32. You never say no to free booze or bein’ smoked out even if you gotta be up in less than 5 hours.
33.You may not do smart things, but you can rip up a IQ test.
34.You’ve been to the casino way before you were 18.
35.Whenever you tell people where you are from, deep down you are bragging a little.
36.You can easily walk to water from your house.
37.you complain about there being nothing to do, but know damn well you aren’t going to actually do sh– about it.
38. If you’re a girl you probably know how to knit, and if your a guy, you probably know how to fix a car.
39. You’ve been to Blackbird for lunch at least four times in a row.
40. You’ve been scarred from jumping off of Point White.
41. You’ve jumped off a dock in the middle of January.
42. You know the name of everyone in your grade.
43. You LOVE AND MISS everyone in your class.
44. You have clothes that are permanently destroyed from Paint Night.
45. You still see the effects of your artwork on Winslow Way.
46. You call your teachers by their first name.
47. You secretly want to be an American Studies teacher just so you can hang with the department.
48. You have or have watched someone give a Credo and cried.
49. You and everyone you know has at least some article of clothing from Bay Hay and Feed.
If you live there now you are probably taking it for granted, and if you are already gone, you f—ing miss that place.”
