Category Archives: Humor

Amusing Monday: Comedians share their thoughts about water

Actors and comedians are talking about water in a new video campaign to raise awareness about the value of clean water and the importance of keeping pollution out of waterways.

Waterkeeper Alliance brought together celebrities to share their feelings and memories about water uses. They include Neil Patrick Harris, Susan Sarandon, Bobby Moynihan, Taran Killam, Ray Romano and Brad Garrett.

Locally, Puget Soundkeeper Alliance is affiliated with the national Waterkeeper Alliance. Puget Soundkeeper Chris Wilke, based in Seattle, is featured in an earlier video that explains the goals of Waterkeeper Alliance and the actions of the various affiliates across the United States and throughout the world.

The new campaign, called “Keep it Clean” is directed by Rachael Harris and produced by Kids at Play.

“We want to get people thinking about what water pollution means to them — to their drinking water, their surf break, their favorite fishing spot,” Harris said in a prepared statement. “But it’s a dirty and heavy topic! So we brought together some of the most brilliant and passionate voices in entertainment to put their own spin on it, to get a little silly, to make people think about why this issue is important, and what they can do to help.”

The videos presented here were announced as the “first round” of the campaign, which I presume means that more will be coming later. The three videos shown in players are compilations of comments on three themes:

  • What’s your favorite use of water? (top video)
  • Heartfelt memories (middle)
  • What does Waterkeeper Alliance do? (bottom)

The other videos show either celebrities speaking alone or with a partner:

Amusing Monday: Bears, birds and more can be viewed live online

The beautiful and powerful brown bears have arrived at Brooks Falls in Katmai National Park and Preserve in Alaska, and everyone in the world can enjoy the convenience of watching these giant bears and other amazing wildlife live from the comfort and safety of their home.

Lots of people have been going out to falls this year to watch the bears from nearby viewing platforms, but I get the feeling that far more people have been watching them from home via the live webcams. I say that because of the number of comments generated on the website. More than a few commenters seem to know the area well and even call the bears by their nicknames. (Park biologists use a numbering system, identifying each bear by coat and claw colors, scars, body size and shape, ear size and shape, sex, facial features and disposition.)

Brooks Falls is one of the first streams in the region where the bears have easy access to bright salmon soon after they leave the saltwater and before spawning. The falls provide a partial barrier to their travels, making fishing easier for the bears. By sometime in August, the fish runs will dwindle and the bears will be gone.

Operators of the multiple live webcams do a good job of zooming in when something interesting happens. Occasionally, so much is going on that they don’t know what to show. Other times, we wait and watch the beautiful scenery, which is especially dramatic at sunrise and sunset.

When the bears are actively fishing for salmon, I find it hard to break away and get back to daily life. One video trick I’ve learned: If you don’t see anything interesting in the live view, you can use your cursor to scan across the timeline to see what has happened for the past few hours and watch that instead.

Park officials have identified the various fishing methods used by the bears in an interesting Q&A section on the national park’s website.

Birds and marine mammal cams

Besides watching bears, it’s a good time of year to watch other wildlife as well via live webcam. Birds are typically active on their nests, raising their young.

Chesapeake Conservancy is featuring the osprey couple, Tom and Audrey, who perennially nest on Kent Island in Maryland. Audrey has taken up with a new “Tom” this year and produced three babies. They also received two foster chicks from nearby Poplar Island, according to information on the website.

Another good osprey cam was installed this year in Belwood Lake Conservation Area near the Great Lakes in Ontario, Canada. Three eggs reportedly hatched, but I see only two chicks in the nest.

Washington Department of Fish and Wildlife also has an osprey cam that updates still photos every 12 seconds.

A puffin cam at Seal Island National Wildlife Refuge in Maine shows a fuzzy chick tucked into a burrow where its mother comes and goes to feed her baby. Other views shows puffins on a ledge where they often hang out. Wildlife biologists are trying to establish a new colony at this location after hunters wiped out the puffins in the 1800s.

Another live camera on Seal Island shows a guillemot in a burrow.

If you would like to see a colony of walruses, (also in video player below) check out the live camera installed on Round Island, Alaska. Sometimes only a few of the large mammals can be seen. Other times, like this morning, large numbers were pushing and shoving each other for space. The comments are often entertaining.

If you are interested in more live cams of wildlife, check out last year’s Water Ways entry from June 23, 2014.

Meanwhile, the Seattle Aquarium is featuring live cams from its displays of harbor seals and sea lions.

Amusing Monday: Puppet, music help people save rockfish

Last week, while looking into some early research findings about Puget Sound rockfish (Water Ways, June 18), I found an amusing video, one created to encourage anglers to save the lives of rockfish when releasing the fish.

The video begins with a talking rockfish (puppet) sitting at a desk and watching a music video. That leads into a conversation about barotrauma, a type of injury to rockfish that results when the fish are caught and brought to the surface from deep water. Barotrauma can be reversed — and the lives of fish saved — by using a device to get the fish back down deep.

If you fish in deep water, you probably already know about this device, but I think everyone can be amused by this video and appreciate how humor can help introduce people to a serious topic.

The first couple minutes of the video introduces the viewer to the problem of barotrauma in simple terms, followed by about five minutes of product reviews showing various devices to reduce the effects on fish. If you are not interested in the technical side of things, you can skip over this part and go to 6:55 in the video. There you will hear the funny rap song about fishing for rockfish, including a line about “sending them back to where you got ‘em.”

The music video, “Rockfish Recompression,” was written and sung by Ray Troll and Russell Wodehouse. Wodehouse is the musician appearing in the video. Those two and others have long performed as the group Ratfish Wranglers, creating funny tunes about fish and related issues.

If you’d like to hear more from this group, check out these YouTube performances:

Amusing Monday:
It’s so dry … you just have to laugh

The ongoing drought in the West, especially California, is a serious problem, but that does not mean that we shouldn’t enjoy a few jokes. I’ve located some “It’s-so-dry …” jokes going back 25 years and covering areas including Arizona, Texas, Georgia and even Minnesota.

Photo: U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service
Photo: U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service

I’ve tried to pick the best jokes I could find. But if you want to see even more, click on my sources in parentheses, not to say that these are the original inventors of these jokes.

The first joke is a little longer than the others:

“I really need to share with y’all how bad the drought is here in Georgia. It’s so dry here that the Baptists are starting to baptize by sprinkling; the Methodists are using wet-wipes; the Presbyterians are giving out rain-checks; and the Catholics are praying for the wine to turn back into water.” (1)

It’s so dry that …

  • … the birds are building their nests out of barbed wire. (2)
  • … the cows out here are giving powdered milk. (3)
  • … the government has announced a water pistol buy-back scheme. (3)
  • … you’re only permitted to eat watermelon between 8 p.m. and 8 a.m. (4)
  • … thieves are siphoning from radiators instead of gasoline tanks. (4)
  • … the dogs are marking their territory with chalk. (4)
  • … the fastest growing crime is employee theft — by pool boys. (5)
  • … you’re encouraged to pee in the pool!(5)
  • … someone snatched my bottled water but left my iphone. (5)
  • … the fire hydrants are chasing the dogs around. (6)
  • … the fish are knocking on the door, askin’ for a drink of water. (6)

“A sad native prayed in Church today, ‘Please, God, let it rain — not so much for me, cuz I’ve seen it — but for my 7-year-old.’” (7)

Q: What do you get if you cross a tortoise and a porcupine?
A: A slow poke

SOURCES

Amusing Monday: Cartoon starts kids on road to discovery

A series of seemingly silly videos, called “Gombby’s Green Island,” is designed to stimulate the imaginations of preschool kids. Themes focus on creativity, knowledge, friendship, humor, discovery and respect for the environment, according to notes on the YouTube channel (English version).

I’ve chosen a sampling of three videos from the 46 available on YouTube. Stories often come in a package of three videos, so each one has two related videos you can find and view with your children, if you are so inclined.

Canadian-based Kidobi, which distributes children’s videos, purchased the rights to the original Portuguese series from Big Storm Studios in 2012, according to a new release. The videos were recently posted to YouTube.

In the series, the main character, Gombby, a boy with a knack for baking, explores Green Island with his friends Strawy and Celeste. Other characters include Gadget Man, who invents all sorts of useful equipment, and the Professor, a wise man who continually explains the ways of the world to Gombby and his friends.

“Gombby’s Green Island is all about discovery: discovering the world, others and ourselves,” states the YouTube notes. “In every episode, Gombby and his friends will also learn about the importance of making healthy lifestyle choices and respecting the environment, about friendship and respecting others.”

The three videos I’ve posted on this page all deal with water issues, but there are plenty of other topics as well. The first one addresses concerns about drought, the second about saving a beached whale, and third about solving a mystery involving a recurring event on a beach.

I guess we can forgive the writers for posing simple and often technical solutions to complex problems, since some of these issues would be difficult to explain to a preschooler with a short attention span. At least the young viewer can begin to get a sense of how to solve a problem. And maybe it’s OK to wait until elementary school or later for a more complete explanation of the science and social values.

In any case, I think most people will find some amusement in “Gombby’s Green Island.”

Will fake killer whale fool sea lions in Astoria — and what if it does?

I was eager to find out if a 32-foot fiberglass replica of a killer whale could scare off a huge number of sea lions crowded together on the docks in Astoria, Ore.

I kept telling my wife Sue, “It’s not going to work” — and I had not the slightest idea that the motorized orca might capsize during its attempt to frighten the persistent sea lions.

About 1,000 people were on hand last night when a human operator drove the orca toward the sea lions, according to Associated Press reporter Terrence Petty. A passing cargo ship created a wake that rushed toward the shore and capsized the fake killer whale. And that was that for now. You can read the story in the Kitsap Sun.

I understand that the fake killer whale might be deployed again against the sea lions in August, when their numbers are expected to be high again. I still doubt that it will work — unless the operators can find a way to aggressively approach the sea lions and stay with the effort for an extended time. It might help to play recordings of transient killer whales — the kind that eat marine mammals. But my understanding is that transients don’t make many sounds when they are in their hunting mode.

I readily admit that I’m not a killer whale expert, but let me tell you why I believe that any sort of limited effort with fake orcas will fail. It’s not that sea lions don’t fear transients. In fact, if sea lions can be convinced that they are being approached by a real killer whale, their fear level could be quite high.

I’ve heard from homeowners who live on Hood Canal, Dyes Inlet and other shorelines that when transient killer whales are around, seals and sea lions head for shore, climb up on docks and even attempt to board boats to get away from them.

So I don’t know if the fiberglass orca will fool the sea lions in Astoria, but does anyone think that these marine mammals are crazy enough to jump into the water if they believe a killer is there waiting for them?

Amusing Monday: Verruckt water slide lives up to ‘crazy’ name

It’s been nearly a year since the opening of Verruckt, the world’s tallest water slide, located at Schlitterbahn Waterpark in Kansas City, Kansas.

Numerous videos reveal a thrilling ride, as three people are strapped into a raft and fly down a 60-degree incline from 168 feet up — higher than Niagara Falls — reaching speeds up to 65 miles per hour. The German word “verruckt,” which means crazy or insane, seems to fit, but I’d love to hear from anyone who has gone down this slide.

A year ago, just prior to opening, more than a few people were alarmed by the continuing delays, caused in part by safety concerns. During practice runs, before any person went down the slide, rafts loaded with sandbags kept flying off the slide in dramatic crashes.

A little less water on the slide slowed the speed and kept the rafts more stable. Still, to this day, riders report that they can feel the raft rising off the slide and going into free fall. The first video shows the initial trip taken by any human. On board were park designer Jeff Henry and ride engineer John Schooley.

Schooley admitted to Astead Herndon, reporting for CNN News, that the ride was more than a little nerve-racking.

“It was terrifying,” Schooley said. “It was great fun, but it was actually terrifying.”

Before the ride was finally opened to the public, most of the slide was enclosed with netting as an added precaution. Read “LiveScience” to see how they can make adjustments to the speed and stability.

The feeling of height and speed is shown well in a promotional video for Garmin action cameras (shown in the second video player on this page),

Another good depiction of the wild ride was shown by reporter Matt Gutman of ABC News. He was one of the first regular folks to go down the slide.

Verruckt is listed by Geobeats in the 10th position among the “World’s 10 Most Amazing Water Slides,” shown in the last video on this page. They all look more than a little crazy.

Amusing Monday: Historical photos reveal lifestyles of long ago

Old photographs can help us grasp human ways of life, long ago supplanted by new ways of thinking, acting and living in the modern world.

Photographs don’t judge; they just depict a truth about how things were at one point in time. At least we can hope for a certain honesty from pictures that predate Photoshop.

Annette Kellerman in her scandalous one-piece bathing suit.
Annette Kellerman in her scandalous one-piece bathing suit.

As they say, a photograph is worth a thousand words, but it still takes a few words to capture a deeper meaning in the images we see, especially when they are far removed in time and place from our own experiences.

I’ve been looking through collections of “historical” photographs compiled in various galleries on the Internet. I especially like the one posted by writer Justina Bakutyte on the “Bored Panda” website. She calls the gallery “40 Must-See Photos from the Past.”

I learned from these photos that a woman’s one-piece bathing suit was once a scandal that could get you arrested, while a two-piece suit was the norm. The first photo on this page shows the scandalous one-piece worn by Annette Kellerman in 1907.

It didn’t take much digging to learn how Kellerman became a competitive swimmer as a child, after she had difficulty walking. Kellerman later became a Vaudeville performer, developing her aquatic artistry as a water spirit.

Annie Edson Taylor with the barrel that transported her over Niagara Falls.
Annie Edson Taylor with the barrel that transported her over Niagara Falls.

Kellerman gained world attention when she was arrested for indecent exposure after spurning the cumbersome bathing dress, which was the norm at the time. Instead, she appeared on Revere Beach in Massachusetts in a one-piece, form-fitting bathing suit. Her action sparked other women to redefine their gender, according to an article in “The Encyclopedia of Women and Leadership in 20th Century Australia.”

Another water-related photo shows Annie Edson Taylor, the first person to go over Niagara Falls in a barrel. The feat took place on Oct. 24, 1901, as shown in the photo.

According to History.com, one man had survived a jump from the falls on the Canadian side in 1829. But Taylor wanted to follow 72 years later with something that would gain even more attention. She strapped herself into five-foot-long pickle barrel padded on the inside. After a wild 20-minute ride, she came to shore battered and bruised. She soon became famous, but she never earned the fortune she had hoped for.

I was also intrigued by a photo of a young girl wearing a breathing apparatus while lying in a hospital bed. She is smiling as she gazes at a small pool next to the bed, in which four baby ducks are swimming. The caption says “Animals being used as part of medical therapy, 1956.”

Animals being used as part of medical therapy, 1956.
“Animals being used as part of medical therapy, 1956.”

An article by registered nurse Lorraine Ernst in “Annals of Longterm Care” says Florence Nightingale was one of the first people to recognize the therapeutic benefits of animals in medical treatment.

While attending Washington State University in 1975, I had the honor of interviewing the late Dr. Leo Bustad, dean of the College of Veterinary Medicine. We talked about the important role that animals can play in the recovery of patients and how pets can lead to a healthier physical and mental condition among the aging.

Two years later, Bustad co-founded the Delta Society, which studied and promoted the human-animal bond. In 1989, the society developed a certification program, which allows animals to visit hospitals and nursing homes to aid patients with their companionship.

As I noted earlier, every picture has a story. I may never find out the identity of the little girl or the benefits of her therapy, but it is interesting to uncover the connections. For me, Lorraine Ernst’s article added information about new discoveries in animal-assisted therapy and what Dr. Bustad helped to bring about.

Other galleries of historical photos can be found on the Flickr page of the U.S. National Archives. One gallery I found especially interesting was “History Through the Camera Lens,” featuring photos of renowned photographers Dorothea Lange, Lewis Hine and Edward Steichen.

Another worthwhile gallery, posted on the Buzzlamp website, is made up of 116 historical photos and documents, including a letter written to Adolph Hitler from Mahatma Gandhi in 1939. While this gallery is not especially focused on a war theme, many of the images are not for faint of heart.

Amusing Monday: If you fish long enough, you are bound to get a little wet

Bill Dance, who learned how to fish from his grandfather on Mulberry Creek near Lynchburg, Tenn., is one of the most recognized sport fishermen in the country.

With 23 national bass titles to his name, Bill Dance retired from competitive fishing in 1980 at the age of 39. His television show “Bill Dance Outdoors” has been on the air since 1968, with more than 2000 programs to date. It’s an amazing career, and it appears this man is still out on the water with his fishing pole.

With all the fishing Bill has done through the years, it is inevitable that he has had a few misshaps along the way. Six years ago in this blog, I rounded up some of the amusing moments this fisherman has lived through. Since then, Bill has enhanced his YouTube channel and compiled five “blooper videos” that show the variety of ways that Bill, his friends and his camera operators have managed to get wet.

I’ve posted my favorite compilation video from the Bill Dance collection on this page. Four other humorous videos can be found under “Bloopers, Goof Ups & Funny Moments” on the “Bill Dance Fishing” channel on YouTube.

Amusing Monday: Winning photo to grace national parks pass

Cameron Teller's winning photograph in the "Share the Experience" contest shows a young polar bear reaching up to its mother. National Park Foundation
Cameron Teller’s winning photograph in the “Share the Experience” contest shows a young polar bear reaching up to its mother.
National Park Foundation

Cameron Teller of Seattle, a former Kitsap County resident, is the Grand Prize winner in the “Share the Experience” photo contest — which means his touching photo of a polar bear and her cub will receive prominent display on next year’s annual pass for entrance into national parks and other federal lands.

Cameron’s photo was among 22,000 images submitted last year in the annual contest, which provides a $10,000 prize to the winner.

Cameron snapped the shot from a boat a good distance away, just as the cub reached its mother. The amateur photographer had gone out on the boat as part of a six-person tour to Alaska’s remote Arctic National Wildlife Refuge, where the group was focused on seeing polar bears and Northern Lights.

“I love going on trips to faraway places and taking photographs,” Cameron told me.

The group had flown from Fairbanks to Deadhorse, Alaska, then onto Kaktovik, the only village inside the wildlife refuge. A guide took them out on a fishing boat, where they spent the day photographing wildlife and scenery.

“The captain was a local resident,” Cameron said. “We went out early in the morning. It was awfully foggy that morning, then it started clearing up. The sun came out and it was a great day for scenery.”

Eric DaBreo of Chico, Calif., received a second-place award in the Share the Experience photo contest with his photo of the Golden Gate Bridge in San Francisco. National Park Foundation
Eric DaBreo of Chico, Calif., received a second-place award with his photo of the Golden Gate Bridge in San Francisco. // National Park Foundation

The trip occurred at the beginning of winter last year, just as the sea ice was freezing up. In fact, he said, the ice had grown so thick around the dock where the group departed that the captain had to choose a different landing site to get the group back to shore.

Cameron said there is nothing like seeing mothers and their babies, and it was a special moment when the polar bear cub walked over and reached up to its mother.

“I still can’t quite believe I won,” Cameron told me. “There were some amazing photos that were entered. I think one of the reasons this appealed to the judges is the whole topic of global warming and protection of the National Arctic Wildlife Refuge.”

Of course, polar bears have become a symbol of the melting ice caps in the polar regions, where the bears are threatened with extinction because of declining habitat.

Cameron moved to Bremerton from Kansas City about 13 years ago to work for Parametrix, an engineering firm with an office on Kitsap Way. He lived in Manette a short time before moving to Bainbridge Island, where he resided for 11 years. For the past two years, he has lived in Seattle’s Queen Anne neighborhood.

Jordan Moore of San Marcos, Texas, captured third place with his photo of a bison at the edge of Yellowstone Lake in Yellowstone National Park in Wyoming. National Park Foundation
Jordan Moore of San Marcos, Texas, captured third place with his photo of a bison at the edge of Yellowstone Lake in Yellowstone National Park in Wyoming. // National Park Foundation

Cameron said the $10,000 prize will help fund his ongoing adventures. He visited Kenya about two years ago and plans to travel to Japan’s northernmost island of Hokkaido next January.

It has been a good year for Cameron, who also won “Outdoor Photographer” magazine’s “American Landscape Contest” with a photo of El Capitan, a vertical rock formation in Yosemite National Park.

The polar bear photo will be featured on next year’s America the Beautiful pass, an annual pass that gets visitors into more than 2,000 public recreation sites on federal land. About 300,000 people purchase the pass each year.

The annual “Share the Experience” contest is sponsored by the National Park Foundation, Active Network, and Celestron in partnership with the National Park Service, the Bureau of Land Management, the Bureau of Reclamation, the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service, and the U.S. Forest Service.

Photographs are now being accepted for next year’s contest, which requires pictures to be taken during 2015 and submitted by the end of the year. Winners will be announced by May 1, 2016. Weekly winners are recognized.

Other winners announced last week in the “Share the Experience” contest include Eric DaBreo of Chico, Calif., second place for his photo of the Golden Gate Bridge taken at sunset from Marshall Beach, and Jordan Moore of San Marcos, Texas, for his photo of a bison at the edge of Yellowstone Lake.

Secretary of the Interior Sally Jewell said she hopes the contest helps inspire people to enjoy the country’s “unrivaled public lands and waters” and share the feeling with others.

“Taking pictures is one of the many ways to enjoy the splendor of our nation’s stunning landscapes and share those treasured moments with friends and family, as well as inspire others who may have never visited to get out and explore their public lands,” she said in a news release.