I am in between. The last days of summer are here and I am finding myself wanting for more.
I’m not done! We’re not done!
I am trying to make the most of these last 2 weeks of summer. It has been full. It has been busy, but as I stand at the edge of Fall I feel —> it has not been enough. I am looking forward and I am hit with the realization that this is my last year with a preschooler. I have spent the last 10 years of motherhood with a preschool-aged child or younger.
Do I know how to be a mom to big kids? This first day of school will by MY last first day of preschool…
Oh, the bittersweet ache of growth. A parent’s goal is to grow our children. Our pride is their progression in education and ability and social integration. And I am finding my heartbreak is the very thing I have been striving for… healthy, happy kids who are learning to be independent.
I WANT to keep them close. I WANT to let them go. I want to keep summer close. I want to let summer go because…
Oh the wonders of Fall!!! The smell. The sound. The feel. It is my favorite season.
Fall reminds me of home. It is a time to refocus and start new routines. It brings a centering of family… The days grow shorter and we hunker down. We build fires, share blankets and snuggle on the couch. We plan for holidays, run to soccer and play practice and rush about in a growing chill. I look at the leaves and talk about the change with my children. Because that is what my great-grandmother did with me.
It’s hard… to wrap-up and gear-up all in one big effort. Yet, it is something that happens every year. It is bittersweet. I am ready for the change, but long for just a little bit more.
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