Ferries get in on Seahawks mania

In honor of the Seattle Seahawks reaching the Super Bowl again, I’m changing my name to Ed Friedhawk for this blog post. Everybody’s doing it, including Washington State Ferries. They announced that Gov. Jay Inslee directed them to honor the team by renaming the ferries after Seahawks players on Sunday.
The M/V Tacoma will become the M/V Jermaine Kearse, for example. That makes sense. Kearse is from Tacoma’s Lakes High. I hope it doesn’t jinx him, though. The Tacoma went dead in the water off of Bainbridge Island in July after an electrical explosion and is still on injured reserve.
Outside of the Tacoma, there was “no rhyme or reason” to the renaming of the other boats. It’s just coincidence that the Bainbridge route, which conspiracy theorists claim always gets the best of everything, wound up with Marshawn Lynch (Puyallup) and Russell Wilson (Wenatchee).
Conversely, Bremerton got Will Tukuafu (Cathlamet). Will Whoafu? He’s actually pretty cool. The huge fullback — 6-foot-4, 280 pounds — blasts open holes on Lynch’s runs. If he misses a block, Beast Mode runs them over anyway.
Bremerton’s other boat, the Kaleetan, will be the “Angry” Doug Baldwin. The city and receiver both have huge chips on their shoulders.
Kingston gets defensive superstars Richard Sherman (Spokane) and Earl Thomas (Walla Walla). Running the Southworth route will be cornerback Byron Maxwell (Evergreen State), offensive tackle Russell Okung (Issaquah) and defensive tackle Kevin Williams (Tillikum).
Here’s the rest of the lineup (M/V means motor vessel, by the way):
M/V Klahowya: “M/V Bruce Irvin”
M/V Chelan: “M/V Michael Bennett”
M/V Chetzemoka: “M/V J.R. Sweezy”
M/V Salish: “M/V Max Unger”
M/V Elwha: “M/V Justin Britt”
M/V Sealth: “M/V Kam Chancellor”
M/V Samish “M/V Jon Ryan”
M/V Hiyu: “M/V K.J. Wright”
M/V Hyak: “M/V Steven Hauschka
M/V Tokitae: “M/V Cliff Avril”
M/V Kennewick: “M/V James Carpenter”
M/V Kitsap: “M/V Bobby Wagner”
M/V Kittitas: “M/V Tony McDaniel”
M/V Yakima: “M/V Luke Willson”