Daily Archives: August 25, 2009

Police blotter: McDonald’s employee threatens Dane Cook impersonators


In this week’s blotter, a fed-up employee at the Bainbridge Island McDonald’s threatened to shoot up the car of his teen tormentors.

Police say the two Bainbridge teens were doing a rendition of comedian Dane Cook’s Burger King drive-through routine (see it here). Repeating the comedian’s words, the kids uttered the word “pickles” in a “funny voice” several times into the drive-through speaker. The employee, a Suquamish resident, didn’t think it was so funny. He asked the kids to pull forward and talk face-to-face but the teens backed out of the drive-through line and began making fun of the employee in the parking lot. That’s around the time the employee dropped a one-liner about killing their car.

Also this week, a woman’s stolen sailboat returns after a brutal Alaskan adventure. Read on for more.

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Four men break-in and beat BI resident at his home

A Bainbridge man was beaten in his home by four young men just after midnight on Saturday, according to the Bainbridge police department.

At about 12:30 a.m., four suspects, between the ages of 18 and 20, entered the Day Road home after kicking in its front door, police said. They allegedly kicked and punched the 21-year-old man in his house for several minutes, then out on a deck, where large blood stains were found by police.

The man suffered several injuries, including abrasions on his face, a large bruise on the side of his head, swollen lips, a large abrasion on his back and scuffed knuckles.

The suspects also reportedly threatened the man’s mother, who hid in a closet during the beating, and assaulted a second male in the home, according to police. Police did not report injuries for the second man.

The suspects, all Bainbridge residents, were angry that the man had allegedly accused one or all of them of thievery, police said.

The man and suspects had been socializing and drinking beer together earlier that evening. After they parted ways, the man noticed that an iPod, pack of cigarettes and a DVD were missing. He drove to one of the suspect’s homes to confront him. Finding that the suspect was not home, the man told the suspect’s mother about the theft and returned home.

One of the suspects, 20, was arrested Monday and has been cooperating with investigators, police said. He was taken to the Kitsap County jail and booked on suspicion of burglary and assault, with bail set at $40,000.

The three other suspects remain at large. One of them has fled to Hawaii, according to police.

Police are asking for the public’s help in finding the suspects. Anyone with information is asked to call (206) 842-5211.